The new Orwellian age has arrived. All films are born sequels but some are more sequels than others. Legally Blonde 2? Fall in behind T3 and Spy Kids 3D. Same-digit movie? Get in line according to your tally of intertextual nods, winks and allusions.

Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines takes the lead place. Fifty allusions (I'm still counting) to T1 and T2; same plot as T2; and more in-jokes than either. To a press-show audience set on a rare roar, Arnold Schwarzenegger plays another android from the future sent to rescue John Connor (Nick Stahl replacing Edward Furlong) so that the world's saviour-to-be can survive with his new-to-the-series destined wife (Claire Danes) as Armageddon beckons.